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Unread 2012-01-10, 16:23   #61
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texasaurus
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Mar 31 2003
2,436 posts
Male
Fort Worth, Texas
 



Dear Uncle Chuck,

Once again the girls I normally support in the footsball have been eliminated from the playoffs. I have a few friends in cities that are still in play (thinking about Houston, because they could use some good news) but I'm afraid, because if I don't root for the Denver Tebows, I might be smote from the heavens. How should I best determine what team to root for?

Thnx N advance 4 ur wizdm,
Needs-A-Saving
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Unread 2012-01-10, 16:36   #62
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Chuck
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May 6 2003
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The real America not that part where you live.
 



Dear Needs-A-Saving,

Anyone but New England, so maybe Denver to keep Jesus on your side and because even the Lord hates Tom Brady and company.

Sincerely Uncle Chuck, who is not making fistfuls of money or banging Gisele BŁndchen
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Unread 2015-04-22, 18:11   #63
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texasaurus
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Mar 31 2003
2,436 posts
Male
Fort Worth, Texas
 



I can't find my keys. What's the best approach to finding them?
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Unread 2015-04-23, 8:16   #64
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Chuck
Member

May 6 2003
16,684 posts
Age 63
Male
The real America not that part where you live.
 



Were you drunk when you came home? If so follow the scratch marks around locks for clues. If you were sober and they are really lost learn the fine art of hot wiring cars to get around and don't worry about door locks at home, quickly make a recording of yourself saying "These guns sure need some target practice, some nice live target practice" then laugh maniacally, loop recording and play loudly then you can feel pretty safe leaving your home unlocked and unattended.
Hope this helps
Uncle Chuck
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Unread 2015-06-01, 19:52   #65
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AsMuch
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Dec 2 2005
6,091 posts
Age 40
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Massachusetts
 



Who are you people? What is this place?!?!?
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Unread 2015-06-02, 10:20   #66
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NocturnalGuy
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Oct 22 2003
5,160 posts
Age 47
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T.O.
 



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Unread 2015-06-02, 11:21   #67
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Chuck
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May 6 2003
16,684 posts
Age 63
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The real America not that part where you live.
 



Quote:
Originally Posted by AsMuch View Post
Who are you people? What is this place?!?!?
We are the priests
Of the Temples of Syrinx
Our great computers
Fill the hollowed halls
We are the priests
Of the Temples of Syrinx
All the gifts of life
Are held within our walls

Look around this world we made
Equality of stock in trade
Come and join the brotherhood of man
Oh what a nice contented world
Let the banners be unfurled
Hold the red star proudly high in hand
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Unread 2015-06-07, 18:10   #68
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AsMuch
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Dec 2 2005
6,091 posts
Age 40
Male
Massachusetts
 



I hope that's a reference I am unfamiliar with, otherwise this place got really creepy in my absence.
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Unread 2015-06-07, 20:08   #69
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b0rg9
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Jan 6 2004
9,854 posts
Age 54
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clearwater, FL
 



Click the image to open in full size.

hmm, now that you mention it, yeah, creepystache...
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